“My Lord God, I have no idea where I am going.
I do not see the road ahead of me. I cannot know for certain where it will end. Nor do I really know myself, and the fact that I think I am following Your will does not mean that I am actually doing so. But I believe that the desire to please You does in fact please You. And I hope I have that desire in all that I am doing. I hope that I will never do anything apart from that desire. And I know that, if I do this, You will lead me by the right road, though I may know nothing about it. Therefore I will trust You always though I may seem to be lost and in the shadow of death. I will fear not, for You are ever with me, and You will never leave me to face my perils alone.”
-Thomas Merton
A friend of mine posted this recently on her blog (www.mysilentjourney.wordpress.com), and I think this really expresses some of what I’ve been feeling lately. Life goes on, and on and on, but we never really know where we’re going. When we hold the Bible, our lantern, up high we can see the path in front of us, but only for a few feet. It shows us where there might be mud, rocks, or a tree in our path of life…the light helps us navigate around those troubles, though it can’t remove them. And when we lower our light, that is when we stumble and fall, because we no longer have the ability to see what’s in front of us or how to get around it. We stand at a crossroads many times in our lives, a point of decision. We hold our lanterns high, we call for directions, and try t o decide which way to go. But the light only travels so far, not nearly far enough to see the end of the road, and sometimes we can’t hear the person trying to give us directions.
“I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
two roads diverged in a wood, and I —
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.”
As Christians we have to take the road less traveled, the one that is difficult and hard to navigate, but the destination is most definitely worth it. But how do we know which way to go? I know I don’t have any clue half the time, beyond what the Bible says, of course. There are basic things that we are told to do or not to do, but when it comes to some big things like career and permanent life decisions…we have to rely on God’s voice, Christian counsel, and the Holy Spirit guiding our judgement. Sometimes I am so afraid of messing up and doing something that is outside God’s will that I forget that he is already pleased by the fact that I so want to know and obey his commands. And even in the times when I don’t want to know, I want to want to know what he would have me do. lol. But you know what? When we think we’re doing the best we can, when we think we are going the direction we should be (even if we aren’t really) we just need to keep going on, if we are open and trying to hear God’s voice, he will help us know which road to take. And if we come to a dead end, He will always let us turn around and try again. Just keep seeking Him with all your heart, look for Godly counsel, and trust the holy Spirit to guide you.
“The road goes ever on and on,
down from the door where it began.
Now far ahead the road has gone,
and I will follow if I can.”